The Talk
by black4minister
Summary: Two weeks ago, James Potter asked Lily Evans to marry him. Inless then one month they will be wed. James decides it's time they had 'The Talk' One-shot


**A/N: It's me!! I'm back!! And all my nasty exams are over-I'm free, free, free!!!-And not crazy I swear ;-) Anyways, another little randomness of the maruaders just to get me back in my stride-enjoy!!!**

**Disclaimer: A rose by any other name would spell as sweet-and if I could pawn of HP as my own, you know I would ;-p**

"How do I even bring it up?" James worriedly paced the living room of the small flat he shared with Sirius and Remus. Not for long, he thought, soon he'd be moving in with his wife.

"I can't help you there, mate" replied Sirius, who was slouched on the couch.

"I mean" continued James, now chewing the top of his thumb, "We've been going out for over a year now. And I've been chasing her since 3rd year. She's going to be so mad I didn't talk to her earlier"

"Well, these things don't just crop up in conversation. You had to pick the right time. You had to know 100% that you were serious before you had 'The Talk' with her" Sirius stretched. He cared for his friend but this conversation was just plain boring.

"But that's the whole problem" James was getting more and more exasperated, "I know she's the one, I've been 100% sure since I was 13 and these things don't just crop up in conversation, so how am I supposed to bring it up?"

This time Sirius all out yawned "I don't know, mate. Why don't you ask Moony? He's good at that kind of thing"

"MOONY!" James' shout could have deafened half the street. Sirius fell off the couch, as Remus came running in.

"What?" he was a little dishevelled, having been lying down in his bedroom, "Where's the fire? You two didn't try to cook again, did you? I told you not to try...." Remus hurried on into the kitchen, leaving a non-plussed Sirius and a slowly panicking James in the living room. He then came back out, "The kitchen's not on fire" he said, looking a little annoyed.

"No" Sirius stated, still sitting on the floor.

"Then why did you wake me up?-what's wrong with James?" he cut across himself.

"He's decided to have 'The Talk' with Evans and now he's panicking cause he doesn't know how to tell her. Isn't that right, Prongsie?" Sirius ended this simple speech by throwing a role of parchment he had found on the ground, at James. Even through his panic, James' quidditch reflexes worked and he caught the ball, looking bemused.

"Oh, James" Remus came over to him, "So you've decided to talk to her. And you don't know how to bring it up?" James nodded, "Well, it's easy. Okay, you just start with....."

"Honey, can I talk to you about something?" James had taken Lily on a picnic to ensure privacy. Now, she sat down on the blanket next to him.

"What is it, James?" she looked a little concerned at the lack of her fiancé's cheeky grin.

"Well" James picked at the corner of the blanket, "Do you remember you used to ask me why the boys called me Prongs and I told you we just had silly nicknames for eachother?"

"Yes" Lily said slowly, eyeing him suspiciously, "Are you finally going to tell me why you, Sirius and Peter are called Prongs, Padfoot and Wormtail?"

"Yeah, I am" then James looked up, "Wait, what about Remus? Don't you want to know why we call him Moony?"

Lily put a hand on his shoulder, "James, sweetie, I already know why you call him Moony. I worked it out a long time ago"

"You did?" James was taken aback.

"Of course. You think I wasn't going to notice the lunar cycle? The mysterious disappearances.? But I could never figure out where you others went. Is that something got to do with your nicknames?"

"Yes" James stated, then got side tracked again, "Wait, how come you didn't think we were werewolves aswell?"

Lily gave a little shrug, "You didn't come back from every night out looking like you'd lost a fight with a hippogriff"

James blinked, "Oh yeah"

Lily tossed her hair, "So, are you going to tell me?"

"Oh, yeah" James pulled himself together, "Well, yeah, you know about Remus' 'furry little problem'. So, yeah, we wanted to help Moony but obviously we couldn't cause he'd hurt us, unintentionally, of course" After Lily's little revelation, James was having trouble regaining his thread, "So, we kept trying to come up with someway we could go with him. And then we found out that werewolves" he lowered his voice, "weren't a danger to animals. Of course, that didn't help us much but then we were in Transfiguration one day and McGonigal was talking about animagus and ….."

Lily put a hand over her mouth, "Oh God, James, tell me you didn't. How did you do it? That's really advanced magic. It could have gone really wrong"

"It took us until 5th year to figure it out. And it was really dangerous. But it worked so..."

Lily still looked very shocked. Then curiously overtook her, "What do you turn into?"

"A stag" said James proudly, "That's why I'm called Prongs, cause of the antlers"

"So, Peter is Wormtail because....."

"He turns into a rat"

Lily gave a little shudder, "A rat, I don't think much of that"

James laughed, "Yeah, but he's very useful for getting into small spaces, or rooms full of people or-"

Lily held up her hand "I get the idea. I don't want to know. So, a stag, a rat and Sirius would be-oh!"

A large black dog had just ran up and sat down, wagging its tail. Lily held out a hand to stroke him and his tail wagged harder, "Oh, look, James, isn't he nice. James?" She stared at her fiancé. James was giving the dog a very dirty look. The dog was ignoring him and had put his head on Lily's shoulder. Lily looked at James' frown and at the dog and comprehension dawned on her face. "Oh, Padfoot, I get it. Sirius!" Sirius got a slap across the face just as he transformed.

"Ow, Lily. Shut up, Prongs!" James had started laughing, "You know, Lily, if I were a real dog, I would have bitten you. You should be more careful"

Lily was still looking at Sirius, "Wow, I've never actually seen anyone transform before"

James had gone back to glaring, "What are you doing here, Padfoot?"

Sirius crossed his legs on the blanket, grinning as he grabbed a crisp from a bag, "I thought you might need a practical example-and here I am" He spread his arms wide and smiled disarmingly.

James looked exasperated, "Yes, Pads, 'cause obviously I couldn't provide my own example-you know, it's not like I can transform too or anything"

Lily, who was taking this very well, considering she had just been told her fiancé was an illegal animagus, (but then maybe she expected he'd be something illegal), looked over at James, her eyes alight. "Oh, yes, James, you transform. I want to see you as a stag"

James smiled indulgently, and, standing up from the blanket, obliged. A large, stately stag took his place, with large antlers and unusual marks around its eyes, where normally sat James' glasses. Lily looked a little in awe, as she stood up and approached the animal, laughing as James licked her hand.

Sirius made gagging noises, "That's nasty-you two all loved up"

"Well you didn't have to come, did you?" Lily's sentence was punctuated by the amusing sight of a self righteous looking stag nodding from behind her, before he turned back into James, who then stopped nodding and stuck his tongue out at his friend.

James then turned to Lily, putting his hands on her shoulders and looking into her face, "So now you know, lovely, are you alright with it?" He actually looked quite worried, but Lily was smiling.

"Yeah, James, I'm okay with it" he beamed, but she continued "Don't get me wrong, it was madly reckless, and I still think you should have registered but it came from a good place-you wanted to help Remus-it just proves I'm making the right choice" She leaned up and placed a quick peck on James' lips, but he grabbed her and deepened the kiss, wrapping his arms around her waist.

Sirius threw away the sandwich he was eating, pulling a face, "Ew, you two are impossible-all over each other like a couple of octopuses"

James just made a rather rude hand gesture towards Sirius from behind Lily's back.

**A/N: Reviewsies? Pleasies? Welcome me backsies? Lol**


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